Agony Aunt
"My boyfriend posts political infographics on his Instagram story all the time…but refuses to post me."
Dear Reader,
My sincerest apologies that you have been put in this scenario. It can be tough dating a guy who refuses to post you. I often hear the infuriating excuses: ‘I just don’t use Instagram’ or ‘I’m a private person.’ However, in your case, I fear we have hit a crossroads.
Have you asked him why he doesn’t want to post you? Is it because he’s so dedicated to the cause for social justice that you would disrupt the public image he’s trying to portray? Whatever the reason, your little justice warrior boyfriend needs to pattern up, or I’m afraid it’s time to cut him loose.
He’s missed the opportunity to post you on Valentine’s Day, but of course he wouldn’t, that doesn’t reflect his brand. Trust me, I know the type. For him, Valentine’s Day represents a form of capitalist overdrive, the intense commercialisation of our romantic feelings for one another and the eventual ruin of our society. There is no way he could support a cause like that and posting you on his story would obviously contribute to the problem . But don’t worry, there is another day that could prove to be a strong contender. International Women’s Day- the perfect day for him to celebrate women’s achievements, but also celebrate you!
With this presented opportunity, he better seize it with both hands and click that post button.
If not, then your social justice warrior boyfriend’s heart is not in the right place because it’s pointless competing with a Canva template.
My condolences,
Agony Aunt
"I got trampled by a rugby lad in the SU bar."
Dear Reader,
Firstly, I sincerely hope you are physically intact. Being flattened in the SU bar by a charging rugby lad is not how anyone plans to spend their evening. The SU bar is many things, but it is not one for contact sport.
Now, let’s address the real issue: the rugby lad ego. Rugby boys do have a reputation for being somewhat.. expansive. It’s not just the physical bulk, it’s their presence. The booming laugh, the pack mentality, the assumption that any room they enter is simply an after-match social. On a pitch that energy is admirable. But in a crowded bar, it’s just spatial arrogance dressed in a quarter-zip.
Whilst confidence is attractive, entitlement is not. If he knocked you over and carried on, that’s not just ‘laddish banter’, that’s poor manners. Even rugby has rules about tackling.
So, here’s my advice: don’t shrink yourself to accommodate someone else’s oversized sense of importance. The SU is shared ground, and you’re entitled to stand at the bar without bracing for impact. In the meantime, stand where you like, take up your space, and remember the loudest presence in the room is rarely the most impressive
Yours sturdily,
Agony Aunt
“I rejected my potential soulmate because he was 5’10 and not 6’5…was I being too harsh?”
Unless you are a tall gal yourself, then respectfully, stop talking nonsense. Rejecting your potential soulmate because he wasn’t up to your extremely high (pun intended) standards? Because he does not tower over you like an obnoxious Jacob Elordi-type giant? Stop trying to recreate your Netflix, The Kissing Booth fantasies and touch some grass.
Don’t get me wrong, everyone is allowed to have a preference. However, it gets to a point when you have to draw the line. If I somehow find out that you are challenged in height yourself (under 5’4ft), and that you are demanding a man practically triple your size, I fear the police may have to get involved; because your ‘preference’ feels illegal.
The same goes for abnormally tall men (over 6ft) pining for women who are ‘petite’ and ‘cute’, thin, but also curvy with perfect hourglass proportions, have perfect skin, and are well under the national average female height. It’s ironic because most of the time, the ‘men’ with these wishes look like they snuck onto earth. To that, I’d say you deserve to stay single and alone.
Finding a man who meets the requirements to function as a decent human being in 2026, is like trying to find a needle in a haystack. Height is the least of your worries. Describing him as your potential ‘Soulmate’ insinuates that he is quite literally a perfect match for your soul, surely? So consider focusing on THAT.
All the best,
Agony Aunt
