A Four-Year-Long Relationship
Written by Amy Kan, Co-deputy Editor, BA International Relations and Japanese
In true SOAS Spirit fashion, I write this article a day before print. My nostalgia is high for this final release of the 2025-26 academic year.
After eagerly responding to an Instagram post in January 2023 with my totally professional CV, I joined the team as a contributing designer, marking the start of my 4-year relationship with this newspaper. Honestly, I didn’t even know the Spirit existed until a few days before I applied, but it enthralled me. It was a chance to fulfil my dreams of working in journalism.
After spending a gap year making creative designs through free Adobe trials, binging Gilmore Girls, and dreaming of being a student journalist, it seemed like the perfect opportunity for me. That isolating year I spent, anticipating university while living in the excitement of finally finishing school, was nothing like what I had actually dreamed. I spent hours in my room holed up amidst the pandemic, trying to make my little MacBook Air survive the countless Adobe applications I had open, with no real goal. But because of this, I joined the realm of university journalism as a designer, hesitant about my writing skills.
Little did I know that in four years, I’d be writing in a magazine about how far that personal project got me.
I started on Issue #23, designing the ‘Sports & Societies’ section, a section that often gets overlooked, but I found myself intrigued with how much I was learning about individual stories and why people were so committed to their societies. After that, I wanted more. I knew I could do more, and it only strengthened how much I loved having my work visualised and given a physical existence. I was spotting mistakes in the images and the inconsistencies, which, I cannot lie, irked me then and still do today. For Issue #24, I practised as the Creative Director, managing the layout. Not to toot my own horn, but the issue actually looked cohesive! I was excited to have this ability and to prove to myself that, throughout the gap year, when I felt I wasn’t creative enough, it was actually beneficial. I was excited to be at university for the next three years if it meant I could continue this incredible relationship with the Spirit.
Naturally, the next step was to officially take over as Creative Director in my second year. But after Issue #25, the honeymoon period of this relationship waned, and came the reality-check stage. I was in charge of social media, requesting pictures and credits, checking over statistics, and creating spoken ideas into something tangible. I surprised myself with what I could do. I had the confidence to write an article about ‘Sex Education’, I had started a new job, and I was proud of my work. My friends were proud to see my face on page 2. But soon, it felt like I had the whole creative department of the Spirit on my shoulders. And as a second year leading a mini team, I still felt intimidated. Ironically, I didn’t think I had a voice, even though I represented the student voice. After all, I was merely a designer!
The hardest part was trying to stay off Instagram, but when my role required me to be online, I struggled. As spring came, the pride of working for the Spirit shattered; most of the team were graduating, I was headed off to Japan, too far to be bombarded with the releases, and I was confident I wouldn’t be working on the Spirit ever again. After enough copy and pasting, screenshots, and reading countless articles, I was ready to tear up the paper.
This ‘rough patch’ period of my relationship with the Spirit recovered as I moved countries and only worked on the designs once every few months. It’s true what they say: distance makes the heart grow fonder. I began to be proud of this paper again, and with the introduction of Anima, I was amazed. I wrote twice while abroad, no doubt that being away and unable to see reactions helped. Once about ‘Brat Summer’ and another about the culture of using Hinge. I appreciated having my name and face in print, but still, as I saw the work and effort being put in, I was certain I didn’t want to experience that pressure again.
Four releases later, I was asked to join the team. I hesitated for a while, knowing how much time it took from me. Returning as a final-year student, I didn’t want to waste my precious time (which I could totally be spending on readings). Thinking about Anima, I just barely survived with four newspaper releases. But I agreed to join after someone reminded me how useful this would be on my CV. I had skills and knowledge about the Spirit that others didn’t, and it would be stupid not to utilise them.
The more I spend thinking about this article, fuelled by the print deadline in 12 hours, I laugh at how this year really was the ‘repair’ phase of the relationship. Looking back, I can’t believe I hesitated. Seeing the change in myself, in the Spirit, and in how things are run, I’m glad it's different. I know my values and boundaries, but honestly, the biggest change is knowing how and when to speak up and communicate. Working on the senior editorial team with Roxy and Maaryah has given me a voice, and working with a diverse team is undeniably empowering. Having the confidence to take control of creativity, rather than being afraid to do something outside the Spirit’s ‘traditional’ look, has been a game-changer. It’s taken 14 newspapers and 4 magazines for me to feel entirely comfortable, but I think that’s what's nice about going to a university where your change is noticeable. Your mark is made, whether you’re assisting in hosting events or giving career advice in a society. That adds pride to representing the student voice – amplifying what needs to be heard, sharing news we all need to know, and giving niche pop culture updates. It’s easy to downplay your university achievements, especially when it seems like there isn’t much competition.
Four years ago, I never would have guessed that I would be a Co-deputy editor of the university newspaper after creating lyric designs for indie artists. The work and effort that I have put into the Spirit is immense – and while this is technically the breakup stage of the relationship, there’s no hard feelings.
